Aussie Ninja sips from his pimp cup
Publisher: Shock Records
Mon, 26 June 2006
by: Australian Ninja
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So what the heck is "Crunk" anyway? Having never heard such music before I turned to the magic old Internet to help me with my musical enquiry. I tried turning to the magic old lamp in my neighbours shed first, but it turned out to be a piece of crunk. Clearly when faced with a possibly not magical lamp vs. the Internet for finding information, the Internet was the easier option. Some say that the word crunk comes from the words 'crazy' and 'drunk.' Or chronic and drunk hence crunk. Still others say crunk comes from mixing the words 'crazy' and 'funk.' Then there are the rest of the people who say "What the hell are you talking about?"
Whatever your chosen origin or definition of crunk - the music usually involves a "state of heightened excitement" if we believe what Lil Jon has to say. Who is Lil Jon? Well I remember him as the guy Dave Chappelle took the piss out of on his excellent comedy show. "Yeeaaasssss!"
 | | Whaaat?! Okaaay!!! |
But getting back to the music, Lil Jon is one of the guys who creates and promotes crunk. He also promotes the energy drink 'Crunk', yes a drink. I swear I'm not making this up: www.crunkenergydrink.com Why he does these things is beyond me. Is he a zombie robot from hell with a limited vocabulary? Maybe he is kids, mayyyybe he is.
My experience of the Crunk Hits collection was loud repetitive music, lots of bass with a healthy dose of swearing and naughty words. If I understand correctly from my online reading, Crunk seems to be a hip-hop offshoot, more specifically "Crunk is a high-impact brand of party hip-hop". But I may be wrong, as I said it's the first time I've ever heard this kind of music.
The best thing about his review is I have a genuine excuse for using more crazy-ass slang words than any white middle class European has any right to. Who's on the collection? Well I couldn't pick these guys out of a police line-up consisting of hip-hop artists and drunken Irish Priests from craggy island but for those who do know the artists include:
Usher, Ciara, Lil Jon & The Eastside Boyz, Chingy, Khia, Trick Daddy, Ying Yang Twins. For the full listing and some music samples click see the link at the end of my review.
I think if you've read this far then I can assume you know something about the music and artists and most likely more than me on the subject. Then again perhaps you just really like reading my reviews. Whichever reason it is you deserve a reward, give yourself a pat on the back. Now don't you feel special?
I'd be lying if I said I was a fan of this music, but I have nothing against it. A couple of tracks I enjoyed, such as "Get Low" the others didn't excite me too much. But you know what, I'm not particularly a fan of hip-hop in the first place -yeah I know this is technically not straight hip-hop and that some people might be offended at having crunk and hip-hop being used in the same sentence - but I enjoy all kinds of music. Most of the hip-hop and rap I have listened to has been in San Andreas and obviously in films. In that context I really enjoy the music. But I'm not going to run out and buy the albums. And I couldn't tell you the big names in the business if my life depended on it. But I did steal.., I mean find, these fun expressions online - feel free to use them:
 | | Are those the only options? Tough choice... |
"What sup with all these weak niggas trying to get Crunk?"
"Yo son, them beats is mad crunk"
"I really wish that wigger would pull his oversized pants up to his waste."
If you're still reading then you really should amuse yourself by checking out the search words 'crunk' and 'wigger' at www.urbandictionary.com
If you are into this kinda music, then Crunk Hits is a fair collection of the main crunk artists. I don't know jack about this style of music, as you may have surmised by now, so don't believe too much of what I have to say. Have a listen for yourself at the link to the Shock Records website
And before I go, I'll leave you with my own lame hip-hop inspired sentence: Dammmmn fool, that review was full o' crazy shit - you 'aint dope, you 'aint a playa, you're jes' weak nigga, weak.
by: Australian Ninja
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More articles by Australian Ninja
Fo sho dog, that shit was all crunked up | |
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